I get annoyed too easily sometimes. I wish I had a button that I could push that could shut the annoyance off. When I am feeling exceptionally annoyed, I have to tell myself, "Stop it, this is silly.". There are so many things that are happening in this world that are way more serious than some woman looking funny at me in Target. In fact-- the other day I went to The Noodle Company ( a restaurant) with Hal and Owen. There were two ladies sitting behind us visiting. I got up to get the kids ready to go and I was having a hard time maneuvering my gigantic stroller through the small walk way between the tables. I mean-- I was having a hell of a time. These ladies behind us just sat there at their table visibly rolling their eyes at each other. The one lady whose back was facing us turned around and gave me the "evil" eye. There was a chair that was in front of my huge stroller and I needed to move it so I could get through. I was annoyed. These ladies just sat there and watched me-- it got really awkward and their eye rolling flustered me. I could feel my face getting redder by the second. Finally, after I pushed the chair out of the way ,I was able to walk past the ladies table. While I walked past them I looked at them as they were still looking very disgusted with me and I said to them " thank you for all of the wonderful eye rolls today, and you are welcome for getting to watch me struggle my way past you". I also said, " I have never seen two crabbier looking old ladies in my life". Oops. That wasn't nice to say. I know strollers are annoying. I get that we may have interrupted what ever conversation they were having, but I couldn't help myself. I still get annoyed when I think about this unpleasant experience. I wish I had a picture of them to post on this blog. If I had been thinking I would have snapped a quick picture with my blackberry.

I would like to take a class on how to not get annoyed or how I can stop the annoying feeling I feel creeping up on me. I wish they offered at class like this at our local community center. They seem to offer classes for everything else.

Hal had preschool today. I am almost sure she has her first crush. I didn't know that four-year-old's got crushes. Every time I say the name Austin she gets a really goofy look on her face. Jesse notices it too. Today, Austin got out of his van at the school and before I even said anything, Hal said " MOMMMM". I don't know why she said mom like that, but she said with that goofy look on her face.

We got a new camera today. I am excited to use it tomorrow for Owen's first birthday!

Last night we got some feedback from people who have looked at our house. I guess the one thing about our house that is keeping people from making offers is the fact that we have a strange back yard. It is a forest. Whatever. Its not like I can get a chain saw and cut all of those trees down, it is a state park. I guess we will have to find some hippies to move in. Hippies like trees.

Today is going to be another long day of trying to keep the house in order for a showing at 4. Please someone give us some feedback so we know what people like and dislike. Jeepers. People are just coming into my house, walking around and then leaving. Its like....someone is coming into my home and judging my family and then we are left wondering if anyone likes what they saw. The house has not been on the market for a week yet so I shouldn't be getting ahead of myself I guess.

I heard some sad news the other day. I found out that a childhood friend of mine lost her baby. She was close to her due date and on Easter Sunday noticed that her baby was not moving. The baby was born yesterday (I think). I am keeping this family close to my heart. My heart breaks for them and their family. It really makes me wonder why these things happen to such amazing people. I cried for them after my girlfriend called and told me what had happened.

A Little of This and a Little of That

Owen and Hal are still in bed. Keyton just got on the bus and is on his way to school. I thought I would take advantage of the quiet few minutes I might have (before number 2 and 3 wake up).

Yesterday we showed our house twice. I am hoping for an offer today.

Jesse has been flying like a crazy person the last couple of weeks. Great...job security!

I really think with Jesse being gone and me here with the three kids all day long by myself has really started to make me goofy...or goofier than I already was. Yesterday, I went inside a gas station with all three kids on a mission to get something-- after I got inside the gas station I couldn't remember why I was inside. I stood there dumbfounded. Finally, the cashier asked if he could be of any help. I declined his offer as I didn't know why I was there in the first place. I put Owen's car seat down beside me (he is heavy in that car seat). I grabbed a pack of M&Ms and paid for them. I walked to the door with Keyton and Hal close behind. I opened the door, while I was holding the door open for Hal and Keyton I looked over and noticed my baby asleep in his car seat resting next to the candy section. I did a great big " OH MY GOD!" I ran over to my BABY and scooped up the car seat. I looked at the boy behind the counter and his face said it all. He was thinking holy crap this girl has issues. Seriously-- I will not be going inside a gas station until my last child has graduated from high school.

On a high note, my house is super duper clean. I have scrubbed this place from top to bottom. It makes me feel good, but at the same time trying to keep it this way is wearing! I have been chasing around my kids picking up after them and in the process realizing that I have not done a good job of teaching them to actually throw trash in a garbage can. The other day Hal was drinking a juice box. I was eyeing her because I often find these juice boxes scattered around the house. She sipped and sipped until the juice box was as flat as it could be. She took the straw out of her mouth and then catapulted that juice box across the living room! I stared at her for a minute. I then walked over to her and I asked her "Do you know that you just threw your empty juice box across my living room?". She looked at me like I was an alien and she said, "no."; I then calmly told her to go pick it up and throw it in the trash can. She did. Later that day I watched her throw the core of an apple across the living room. I then decided it was time for a lecture on what to do with trash. I sat Hal and Keyton down on the sofa and I said, "Hal and Keyton, it FINALLY has come to my attention that you don't know what to do with garbage"," Where do you think garbage goes?" Keyton got excited and said "In the garbage can!" Ding ding ding! My kid is so smart. I will be watching them like a hawk over the next few days so I can teach them the difference between mommy and trash man.

Happy Easter!

Easter was a lot of fun today. Yesterday we had an Easter egg hunt in our back yard. First I hid the eggs and then Keyton and Hal took turns hiding the eggs. Keyton and I each hid them so they were not impossible to find. We have a forest in our back yard so it could get tricky if we went to crazy. Hal didn't take our approach to hiding the eggs. Hal actually hid the eggs under massive amounts of leaves. She told Keyton and I to be careful where we stepped because she didn't want us to step on the eggs. She also went into the forest and hid a few eggs. Keyton was to scared to go into the forest because last summer he got a tick and knows that the forest is a breading ground for these monster like ticks. Therefore we found 6 eggs out of the 24 eggs Hal hid. After digging around in the leaves for a half hour both Keyton and I gave up.

Today we decided to skip hiding eggs. Instead we went to the park and flew kites with grandpa David. Before we went to the park my dad cooked us a wonderful Easter dinner. My dad can cook the a mean turkey dinner! The Easter bunny came this morning and brought the kids side walk chalk, bubble wands, play doe, and to much candy. Owen got a few cute summer outfits.

I would post pictures of our day, but I could not find the battery charger so no Easter pics. I promise Owen you had a great first Easter!

Grandpa is Here!

My dad is here to stay with us for the week. Thank God. I am loving every minute of his visit. At about 3:30 this afternoon our realtor called and informed me that there was someone who was interested in looking at our home and to plan on them coming at 5:00. I ran around this house like a wild woman picking up all the clutter and throwing it into random drawers. My father also ran around and helped to dispose of any messes he could see. He ended up taking a bunch of stuff and throwing it into the back of my minivan. After an hour our realtor called and said that we could come back home. I guess the people really liked the house and are planning to come back later this week with someone who is flying in from Korea so who ever that is can also take a lookie.

The kids have been looking forward to dying Easter eggs all week so we finally tackled that this evening. We only had 9 eggs to color because we broke most of them when we were boiling them. Oops. The highlight of my day was a 2 hour nap I took with Hal before Keyton came home from school. The only thing that disturbs me about this nap was that my dad had to go get Owen because he was crying and I didn't hear him as I was sleeping soundly I guess. This really makes me wonder how often this happens. I guess I will have to take out the baby monitor again. Another Oops!

Owen is still not crawling. Instead he rolls from one end of the house to the other. Today I was cleaning up the kitchen and I looked down just in time to see him roll out into the dining room. I can not imagine that this feels good on the hard wood floors, but he seems to enjoy himself. He is getting so big. Owen loves his grandpa David. I was surprised that he wasn't scared to go to my dad because he doesn't get to see my dad very often, but he went right to him when my dad puts his arms out to take him. Owen is with me all day ever day and rarely sees other people. I guess Owen is a laid back kind of a guy. Today I tried to take Owen back from grandpa and he would not come to me! My dad loved every minute of it.

I am anxious to see what happens with the people who looked at our home today. Happy Easter and I will try to post some recent pictures of the kids soon.

For sale sign

We have a for sale sign up in front of our home. It is bittersweet. The Realtor came over yesterday to take pictures of our house and Keyton ran after her asking her to stop taking pictures of his home. He understands that the pictures mean we are leaving his house-- this is a home that he loves with his whole little heart.

Its hard to put into words how I am feeling right now. Last year we were in an awesome place. I had an awesome job working as a RN at Abbott Northwestern, Jesse was working at his dream job at Jet choice, and we were expecting or third child. For once everything seemed to be going the way we wanted it. Then suddenly I got put on bed rest at the hospital, I got a blood clot, Owen was brought into this world weighing only 2lbs, Jesse's mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, and Jesse's company decided to shut its doors. Everything was crumbling down around us. Jesse and I believe in positive thinking and we TRIED to remain positive throughout. Thankfully it worked. Jesse was able to get another great job, Owen is healthy, and Sue (Jesse's mom) is done with treatment and she is doing wonderfully. I am constantly trying to remind myself about all of these positive elements. Every time I hold Owen, I squeeze him tightly and thank my lucky stars that he is here with us. We are lucky. I know this.

This for sale sign is heart breaking. I have to keep reminding myself that this move is for the best. Apple Valley is a beautiful community and I will miss it greatly, especially my neighbors. I do need my family though. Jesse is gone every other week---gone, gone. Taking care of three children by myself with out a support network has worn me out, physically and emotionally. When Jesse is home I am content in Minnesota, happy even. When Jesse leaves, I am lonely and at times depressed even. Knowing that my family is 10 hours away, who would love nothing more than to snuggle my kids has always been hard to swallow. I have many friends back home with children my children's age and I long for that connection. I left Williston and was determined to never move back. I remember the day we left Williston, we stopped by my parents house on the way out of town to say good bye. I remember watching my mom and dad cry as we pulled out of the drive way. Their grandchildren were leaving-I felt incredibly guilty about the sadness this caused them. When I think about bringing my children back to Williston and how happy my parents (especially my father) will be, it makes the move back seem so worth it. I keep thinking how short life is. I feel the uncontrollable need to be with the people that love me. I feel the need to keep my children close to the people that love them as much as Jesse and me. So the for sale sign should not be making feel this way. I think we will be okay where ever we are. Someday I plan to live somewhere warm all year, when Jesse and I are oldies. Lets just pray that I can keep this house clean so people will want to buy it!! Life is good, just a little confusing.