Crazy?!?

The other day I dropped off two written prescriptions at my local pharmacy, which I had received from my family doctor earlier in the day. About two hours later, I went back to pick up the scripts and the pharmacy tech informed me the pharmacist told her that he would not fill one of prescriptions, unless he had word from the doctor that it was okay to fill it. I guess it had not been 29 days since I had filled it last, and the soonest I could fill was two days later, which was a problem, since I was leaving on a trip the next day. At first, I was okay with this, and I walked away from the counter, but then all of a sudden something snapped in me,  I was suddenly flooded with these intense feelings that I had never experienced before (seriously). I whipped around and found myself standing in line again at the prescription counter. When it was my turn, I could feel that my face was flushed. I said to the pharmacy tech, "You know, I like, really- really need that prescription to go on my trip." I had a written prescription from my doctor, which in my view meant the doctor had given them permission to fill it. The pharmacy tech turned to another pharmacy tech. The new pharmacy tech told me (not nicely) that it was the pharmacist's call and they (the techs) had no control over the situation. I felt my face grow redder and I said, "Enough! I want to talk to this pharmacist!" So, the pharmacy tech went behind a divider and I heard her say to a the pharmacist, "A crazy person wants to talk to you." So, I said to the divider, "Yeah, only that is why I am here, to pick up my pills-- so I am not crazy anymore." Then I turned to see a woman sitting in a seat  (whom I assumed was waiting for a prescription) gawking at me, as soon as she saw me looking at her, she hurried and buried her head in the magazine she was holding. The pharmacist walked out from behind the divider and made eye contact with me. I think my pupils had dilated and I was sweating and bright red. He told me something about how my doctor would have to contact him to give him permission to fill the prescription.....blah blah blah.  I explained, my doctor wrote me the script that day, and that my doctor knew I was going on a trip and that should be enough permission to fill the damn thing (I also may have told him that my doctor was going to be REALLY MAD at him when he finds out what he did). Then I found myself saying, "I'm not crazy!" After, which I didn't really prove my point because, I told him to take my written prescription and eat it--Then I walked out. Okay, I actually told another human being to eat a piece of paper, after I had explained to the whole pharmacy that I was not crazy. In all of my 30 years, I had never yelled at someone who was only doing their job. Yes, I think we all have crazy moments, where we act/speak before we think. I found a new pharmacy. I didn't bark.

At this point in my life I feel satisfied, as if past events have possibly "hardened" me a bit. I  have a happy feeling deep inside my tummy, and I am pleased with who I am--finally. For so many years I was ashamed of who I had been. I think I have been extra sensitive and finally some of that sensitivity is lessening itself.  Like, I have stated previously, I have been known to act sort of extreme in situations that are out of my control, especially, if it involves people that I love (Which, by the way only pushes those people further way--duh). I feel though, I am finally at peace with those situations.  Depression is a hard subject for many people to communicate. It is my choice to talk about it openly, hoping that others might actually read this and those people might not feel so alone. My best friend emailed me this link today, I wanted to share it. http://www.cnn.com/2012/08/22/living/going-public-with-depression/index.html?c&page=0