Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Changes

Life has defiantly changed since the last time I posted. Hal and Keyton are getting ready to start school tomorrow. Hal will be a first grader and Keyton will be a third grader. Owen is getting ready to start daycare. I am getting ready to start working and Jess is getting ready to help his father with Harvest. I guess we are all getting ready--for something. I got a job at the hospital, and I will be working as a labor and delivery nurse. I will do training on the medical surgical unit first.

I am tired---both emotionally and physically. I don't know if it is all the up coming changes or if it just everyday life. Thankfully, the class I am currently taking has been easy thus far (hope I didn't just jinx myself).

Some times I just need to sit down and evaluate what it is that I have, what is that I want, and what is that I need. I have plenty, I have more than enough. I want to be successful. I need my family and friends. Changes are rough. I am scared. Am I really ready to drop Owen off at a daycare? I don't know, because I have not thought about it. How challenging is it going to be to work, take care of three children, and go to school? I don't now. Jess is gone all of the time with work and now with harvest approaching. I am and have been extremely independent as a mother this far, and I will continue to try and do my best--at being an independent mother. I think there are some people who live in some sort of bubble, where their world is the only world that matters. I don't want to be that person. I want to be aware of what is going on in the world. I want to help with what I can and hope for things I have no control over. America, besides some of America, has came a long way. I recently read a book called The Help. It is a great book--and I recommend it. I will teach my children the value of self worth, I will teach my children the value of EVERYONE'S self worth. I don't want my children to ever be persuaded by the hatred of others. I want my children to be able to know the difference between hatred and truth.

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